What I Lost and Want Back
I really miss college.
Scratch that. I miss parts of college. Mostly, I miss living in the dorm. I lived on this hall that was known for causing problems and for staying up all night to play MarioKart or to watch Dog the Bounty Hunter. In other words, we were driven by impulse, consumption, and entertainment. And we loved every minute of it. We sucked at homework and even worse at being polite. I mean, some of my friends peed in a water gun and sprayed it in someone’s mouth, for God’s sake.
It was awesome.
One time, we did a trading spaces thing, and another set of guys transformed our room into a womb, covering the walls in red sheets and even hanging gigantic representations of a sperm and an egg. It was epic. And disgusting. But oddly comfortable and safe.
In the cafeteria, we were loud and obnoxious, notoriously known as “The Table of Kids Who Don’t Wash Their Hair,” and we made the biggest, most badass ice cream cones in the world. And then smashed them in people’s faces.
We were terrible people. And I didn’t mind. In fact, I miss it.